If you’re using ICBM for ICQ connectivity, note that you can modify each user’s settings by navigating to ~/home/config/settings/BeCQ-YOURUIN/contacts. Inside this directory, each user is listed by their ICQ UIN.
To modify the properties of any user just right-click their file and choose Open With | DiskProbe. Under the Attributes menu you should see [BOOL] ‚BECQ:authorised‘. Change this value to 1 and the user will be on your list without them needing to authorize you.